February 07, 2011
Overcoming Bad Habits in your thoughts!
I had such an amazingly hard day toady, filled with emotions and really hard thoughts about myself. I won’t go into the exact stuff that caused this, but I notice the ugly green monster attack me when I am most vulnerable – the time when I felt safe and secure in who I am becoming. In these moments I suddenly feel myself slip into the dark place that I once was, and begin to question how strong I am and successful I have been. I focus on the mistakes that I make instead of all the success I’ve had. This is such a hard ingrained behavior to ignore, and to not give into. But, over time I’ve become more aware of the problems that arise with these thoughts and moods that overcome me, and have been able to recognize the anguish that I put myself through. Today I wallowed in the pity for the day, but instead of over eating and becoming sluggishly depressed I overtook the mood and kept to my routine. I managed not to buy fast food because it was easier; I made it to the gym for 2 hours of exercise; and came home and smiled instead of cried. I did all this through with the strength I have given myself in my journey and through my faith that as come on strong to fight off those evil thoughts and dark places I use to dwell in. I hope your journey allows you to walk away from the green monster and smile back in victory!